Feeling a little sick and jet lagged. My body can't push itself to stay awake when I'm suppose to be awake. My eyes grow heavy and I give into the sweet relief of unconsciousness - only to be greeted by nightmares that inevitably shake me back into reality.

Nightmares about work and my mom. What gives? I don't even work there anymore and it's still haunting me. And my mom, the recurring subject of my nightmares - I haven't had one of those in a while… and it's off putting. I awoke in a fright grasping at an empty bed next to me. I'm alone. And suddenly I find myself desperately wishing I were home, in the arms of someone safe and familiar.

Maybe now that I'm alone and have all this time to reflect, my mind is finally processing how scared I really am about my situation. I've had nightmares almost every night since I've been here. I've never felt so uneasy on a solo trip. Still waiting for positivity to hit me. But feeling a little sick isn't helping.

I came across a temple walking home from the palace today. I didn't realize it was a temple until I walked through the courtyard lined with colourful lanterns. And for the first time in a while, I took 3 bows and prayed. I feel so lost. Unable to really enjoy myself or be happy with everything around me.

Well, day 2 was a bad one. Let's see how day 3 goes. It's rainy and cold, so who knows.